I dont know what I can do...

I doubt that anyone reads this blog with any regularity.  It really isnt written for anyone other than me, I guess I dont mind if someone reads it since it is generally anonymous and just babble. Im here to post about consistent behaviour, I have none. discipline is something that I lack, something that seems to be affecting me daily and something that I need.

Fuck you

that habit

Im still working to get the habit going. I set my alarm, overslept as I always do...

Tomorrow should be better. I feel that I have a lot of things under control as of today. Now I just gotta get my income moving forward.

A new car!

Ok not really, a few weeks ago I was hit in a parking lot. So this morning I dropped off my car to have it repaired and we get a rental care for about a week.

so I have had a few positive days at work, I have worked about 8 hours total over 2 days and made 3 sales. Now I need to 8 hours a day and I think I will be set.

Now for the really positive stuff.
Im thankful for my wife, she has been really supportive of me she knows that Im doing through hard times.
Im glad that we have insurance so the car can be fixed, its minor damage but still, it will look better once it is repaired.
so much going on and so much to do, Im grateful that I have the skills to do what is needed.

What do I have to talk about

Another attempt at creating a habit in my life, discipline of any type is needed.

Habit

Making this a habit has not worked out yet, finding the space in my mind to do it isnt so easy.

A new day

Its a fresh day, third day of the year...Today I have many things to be thankful for.

Rent got paid, I didnt have enough money, then I had to pay the utilities so I really didnt have enough money.

Then my wife (the best) comes along and says "ohh, I will pay the rent" what a difference that made.

Im still working the same job, doing the same things, I need to change how I am doing these things I have some ideas, but they are not coming together just yet.

Im so grateful that I can pay my bills and move forward now, life is fantastic and it is getting better.

I didn't know I could blog from my iPhone


In other news I dropped the ball negativity has taken over again I do not see a light at the end of the tunnel.  I do not know how I am going to pay bills.   Work took a nose dive, but it is Christmas so I am trying to not worry.

Working on a new schedule

Working from home is killing me, I need to stop lying to myself and acting like it is going to work out. It isnt. This is important for perspective for me, I have to not only have perspective but I need to maintain perspective. I have allowed it to get skewed.

So Im now grinding away on making sales, Im so mad that people can do more sales than I can. It angers me to no end, not only that it affects my life...

Today Im grateful for perspective, without it, I would be uncertain of what to do. I would just wander and never make any changes.
Im grateful for the possibilities that I have, I do not see anything as impossible, just hard. I have strong drive to make this happen.
wonderful support system, I have a loving wife and child, some good friends and they make a lot of difference every day.

New years resolutions

I dropped the ball the last few weeks on the positive thinking stuff. While I am grateful every day I didnt stop to blog about it, or even focus on it. So here we are, if Im going to make any resolution it will be to be thankful everyday and spend five minutes a day doing it.

Im thankful for my perspective, it allows me to see where I am making mistakes.

I am thankful that I can address myself and see my faults and work on them and turn them into something positive.

Im thankful that I have the knowledge to be self sufficient, now I just gotta make it happen.